Saturday, August 8, 2009

Power of Attorney

Please make it stop!
Once an ailing parents cannot manage IADLs ( e.g., banking, driving, credit cards and the other less daly, but weekly activities) you are wise to cancel credit cards and stop the nonsense.

When I phoned about Mom's Sears card they would not stop sending her the catalogues. As an environmentalist, I resented the waste of paper. But it would take a death certificate until they would close the account. The same with Dad's phone bills, credit cards, Bell, and cable TV. They were very good about cancelling them once I phoned, stated I was the Executor and could manage to send them the paperwork. The worst was the car ownership and transferring the car ownership from a dead woman (Mom) to a non-driving man sying of a brain tumour.

I wrote in my book:

Power of attorney - car ownership
Dad’s driver’s licence was rescinded because of his medications and the possibility of another seizure, and this hit his ego hard. This is the law in Ontario.

The vehicle licensing bureau would accept only my Dad’s signature or the executor’s. I had to go trucking back to Dad, find his paperwork, and figure out what to do. He could not walk to the motor vehicle bureau down the street from the Manor, so I ended up taking the papers to him to sign, returning to the bureau three times before it was all done. In the end, we had a car licensed to a man who did not possess a driver’s licence.


Loss of independence: the car transfer--March 31, 2005
Mom and Dad continued to sink into the abyss of dependence, anger, and frustration with the ravages of old age. Dad was so very upset with not being able to drive. He had Mom transfer the car ownership to her, an issue that made life difficult after her passing. Often he would state his frustration to me. It was difficult listening to Dad complain. The tumour had robbed him of his independence and any perceived control over his life. He was quite bitter about this insult.


Paperwork and estate woes--March 2, 2007

I had yet not taken Dad’s clothes to the Salvation Army store. That was a difficult task. I continued to collect my parents’ mail and dealt with that on a daily basis. Reader’s Digest thought Mom might win a billion dollars. That was the most heartbreaking mail--week after week they inundated me with large envelopes, her name boldly inscribed on them. I could not figure out how to make them stop until I finally found an address for a PR person. I wrote and demanded he make them stop. They must have killed a tree with all the paperwork they sent.

This is a familiar story. See an American story:

One Reason CitiBank Needed the Bailout

"A lady died this past January, and Citibank billed her for February and March for their annual service charges on her credit card, and added late Fees and interest on the monthly charge. The balance had been $0.00 when she Died, but now somewhere around $60.00."

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